Saturday, November 21, 2009

"Here you go. Maybe this will help."


So early early Friday morning,
Me, My two younger sisters (Emilee and Kaitlyn), my Mom, my aunt MaryJane, my cousin Courtney and my friend Terri and her Husband all went to the the opening night of Twilight.

You have NO idea how long I had anticipated it.
I'm in love with Jacob.

I'm a Jacob fan ALL THE WAY!
We went to the 2:45am showing.
We bought the tickets two months ago..the 2:45 showing was the only one left!

Let me just say,
I was NOT disappointed.
Really. I saw it again last night with my little brother.
haha I LOVE it.
Jacob is so attractive!

Emilee, Kaitlyn and I made shirts on Thursday night before the movie:

All three of us are Jacob Fans.
(Emilee's shirts says "Not Me" on the case you were wondering ;))

Me, Emilee, MJ, and Courtney

It was SO fun.
SO worth the money (both times)
and SO worth being up until 5:30 am.

You should go see it.

Yesterday I was in class.
The whole class was having a discussion.
One girl started talking about her son.
(she's about my age)

Usually I would be fine.
But for some reason that started a stream of emotion.
I began REALLY missing Avery and started wishing I had a daughter to tell stories about.
It was just one of those moments. I couldn't relate to this girl, because I am not the mother of the little girl I gave birth too. 
(I had about 6 hours of sleep, which is usually the amount of sleep I've been getting.)

I then started tuning everyone out.
I was working on keeping the tears from falling out of my eyes.
So I began texting a birthmom that I have not met IRL yet, but we text all the time and she always makes me feel better.  Her name is Nicole.

after her first reply,
Andrea texted me asking how I was doing.

She always does this.
It's like she knows when I'm having a hard time and I can't take it anymore.

So I just replied telling her I was fine and asked her a question about when they will be approved and on LDSFS site to adopt again.
She answered the question and then said "Are you sure you're okay?"

I swear I stared at the text for a whole two minutes.
I was trying to figure out if I had said anything that made her think I wasn't.
We had been texting each other a couple hours before that and I was fine.

So I replied asking her what made her text me.
and then told her how I was feeling.
She said she just sometimes got fleeting thoughts to contact me and see how I'm doing.
I Love her.
we talked for a few more minutes and then about a half hour later, Dustin texted me.

(At this point,
I was doing better.
Both Nicole and Andrea had calmed me down and I wasn't trying to hold back tears anymore. )

He said that he was sorry I was having a hard time.
I replied letting him know that I was doing better...
and this was his response:

"Here you go. Maybe this will help."

haha I lauged for about 10 minutes and was suddenly completely fine.
I love them.

Dustin and Andrea always know what to say.
and Dustin knew I had seen Twilight the night before and that I love Jacob/Taylor Lautner.
(he's only two years younger than me..that's not bad. lol)

I came home after class, took a nap and when I woke up I was feeling so comforted.
I had to say a silent prayer in thanks for Dustin and Andrea.

Andrea is so close to the spirit.
She is always listening and acting on the promptings she receives.
I know that's how she knew something was wrong.


Michelle said...

You are so blessed. I wish I could have a better relationship with our birth mother so much.

Sharon said...

First of all, love the shirts! I have never read the Twilight books but I did see the first movie and will eventually see New Moon. But ya, I prefer Jacob too (and not just cause that's my hubby's name lol).
I'm sorry you were having a tough time, but I'm glad that you got to feeling better. Now I know pictures of the werewolf make you feel better I'll have to find some to send you. ;o) HUGS!

Chelsey Cutler said...

Oh I want to see it! mmm, Jacob is so attractive!

Andrea said...

You can always count on Dustin to cheer you up! He's hilarious. I'm glad you're feeling better. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about you. Love you Andee.

Keara said...

bwah ha ha ha.

You and your sisters make me laugh. (In the best way possible I promise!) I wish I could have been there to go with you!

Dustin and Andrea are amazing. There isnt more you can say.

The Millers said...

What a cool friend! I love it! Trust me, you WILL be able to have the chance to relate to people one day. I know how you feel. You'll find that when you have children of your own one day, and you will, that the joy you have for them will be even greater. Hang in there! Oh yeah, and I am totally team Jacob (the one in the movie) but totally team Edward in the book. Taylor does do some serious convincing though.

Perla said...

i know its weird to leave a comment on somebody's blog when they have no idea who you are. sorry about that. i just stumbled across your blog from some links from a friend and i saw your video of your adoption story and am crying my eyes out. you don't know me from anybody but i am just so impressed by your strength and dignity. i am an adoptive mother myself. my son's birth mother lives in haiti so i don't have the opportunity to have the kind of relationship you have with andrea, but i think about her all of the time and i pray for her. thank you for your example of doing what is right even when it is hard. we all need that example in our lives.
shannon cox (aka perla)