Tests

I would like to take a moment to express my extreme hatred towards tests.

(I know this is totally against my last post,

but today was a pretty bad day so I don't care.)

I took a test on Friday.

I studied for the test for a WEEK and a HALF!

there was only ONE day out of that time period that I didn't study,

and that's because I was giving an adoption presentation in sandy

so I had to go home.

So I was pretty confident that I was going to do well on this test.

I actually was SO incredibely nervous,

but was confident I would do well.

SO,

Usually when we take a test here at Utah State, our professor has our test results within the next TWO hours.

well,

MY professor decided he would be lazy and he decided not to

PUT THEM THROUGH THE MACHINE

until

TODAY.

So I have been stressing out like crazy, and extremely anxious for the results.

I got them today.

Talk about a waste of time.

I got 13/20.

62%.

I'm pretty stupid.

I am never studying again.

it's a WASTE OF TIME.

(the REALLY sad thing is my roomate didn't study until the NIGHT BEFORE, and she used my notes to do it...she got a better grade than I did.)

I despise tests.

I woke up this morning missing Keltson like crazy.

(he died in October)

I don't know why but I was really thinking about him

a WHOLE lot more than I usually do during the day.

So I was already pretty sad.

So when I received the email with my score,

and opened it.

I'm pretty sure my self esteem dropped even lower.

I just got up and left.

usually when I'm upset and want to cry, I go for a drive.

I don't know why.

So I did.

The second I got in my car I just started BAWLING.

Yes,

I should remember,

It was a NICE day today

I have good friends

a good family

and

many people supporting me with everything I do.

But,

can you blame me for feeling like a complete failure today?

can you blame me?

really?

Anyway.

I HATE TESTS!