HEART IS FULL

I was going to write this post the day after mothers day,

but my life is so busy that I never had time to finish it.

SO I'm sorry.

In all honesty,

I was expecting birthmothers/mothers day to be BAD.

I was not looking forward to either of them and almost started crying everytime I would think/talk about it.

Here is an example of how my day actually went:

* I woke up.

[The night before at like one in the morning I posted my Adoption Video on facebook.

I felt like I should do SOMETHING for birthmothers day. Especially since it seemed most of the other birthmom friends I have on facebook were already doing it.]

I got on facebook before getting ready for the birthmom walk.

I had received probably 8 comments on my video from different people wishing me a happy birthmothers day and saying the SWEETEST things to me.

* One of my very good friends was coming with me to the birthmom walks. He brought me candy, gerber daisys, and a card wishing me a happy birthmothers day. I was SO grateful for that. It wasn't expected and I couldn't stop smiling when he gave them to me.

*We go to the birthmom walk and about10 minutes after getting there, Dustin Andrea and Avery showed up.  We were there for probably a good hour and a half. Avery was ADORABLE and we played with her forever. She is such a light in my life. I felt so peaceful after leaving. I'm SO glad that I can be a part of her life.

* When we were leaving Dustin Andrea and Avery gave me the SWEETEST gift. I got another Willowtree statue that I can add to my collection, Sour patch kids and the CUTEST cards. Avery drew me a picture. Just looking at it melts my heart. Few people can understand how much a picture like that means.

* When I got home from the Walk, I got back on facebook. I had 20 notifications! All of which were from people wishing me a happy birthmothers day and giving me SO much support. I couldn't even believe it. I had SOO MUCH SUPPORT. I got really emotional as I read them all. I can't even explain how grateful I am for all of you. Your support means more than words could ever express.

* I went to work my night shift at work that night...and my COWORKERS were the same way. MAN I love my job. I am SO lucky.

* The next day, Mothers day, Was my good friends homecoming. He just came home from his mission. He is in my ward too! So, I went to Sacramant. I was VERY worried about this to be honest. I wasn't planning on going because it was mothers day and I knew all of the talks would be on mothers. So when I found out his homecoming was this day, I was dreading it.  I got there late because I knew his talk would be last and I thought that might help ease the pain a little.  The last speaker before him was speaking.  Her talk really got to me. She explained in her talk that she understand that mothers day may be a difficult day for some. She made sure to be very sensitive towards this, while still explaining what a gift it is to be a mother.

*When Sacrament was over, they passed out the Annual mothers day gifts. The bishopric stood up and asked that all of the women 18 and graduated stand because they were going to receive that same gift. I LOVE my ward. They are so sensitive to my situation.  I don't think the bishopric even realized how much this meant to me. But I had a really hard time with this last year.  and even then, an amazing woman in my ward got a gift and gave it to me last year. She told me that I was still a mother regardless of whether or not I had a child that I was raising.

*At about 6 on Mothers day I brought Andrea her mothers day present. Avery was there and she was SO sweet. I seriously love the relationship I have with Dustin and Andrea. Thank you Dustin and Andrea. If it wasn't for you, I would not be where I am right now.

I would like to thank EVERYONE that helped me through this. Most of you don't even realize that you contributed. I LOVE everyone in my life. So if you're reading this, consider yourself one of those people.

I hope that your mothers day was as peaceful as mine. I hope that all of the women out there that are in a similar situation as me, or if your someone that feels mothers day is one of your LEAST favorite holidays, I hope you felt the peace that I felt. You deserve it.

 I felt so bad the next day. I was planning on doing the same for all you mothers/expectant/hoping to adopt mothers...but that day was busy. and now I feel kind of selfish. So consider this, a HAPPY BELATED MOTHERS DAY to all of you!!